Out, Damned Spot! By L.G. Readmore

Part 2: Five Star Restaurant: Only accepting patrons with Dry Shirts on!

For those readers that missed Part I of Out Damned Spot, you may read it here, for those that did read the article and need a brief refresher it goes as such:

I began the story by describing the situation with one of my boys and a young lady that he is dating. Although he recognizes this woman's value in his life, he is not able to push past the playa part of his mentality in order to go forth into the land of commitment and exclusivity. Ultimately this internal conflict is an annoyance. I analogized his condition as to having a spot on your shirt and I went on to theorize this condition as the brother having a wet spot on his shirt.

Now I must revert real quick……….why was my partner originally desiring to be rid of his playa mentality (the annoying wet spot on his shirt)? It would be lofty to think that he (along with the rest of us) wants to have a dry shirt just because it is the right thing to do, but we have to keep it real here. The initial reason behind him wanting to liberate the playa in him was a direct result of one particular thing. In his immediate situation he has this wonderful woman whom he thinks a great deal of and surely desires to do right by. For all practical purposes, a woman of this caliber is not going to put up with a bunch of Bull. So he has no choice but to “get RIGHT or get LEFT!” She most certainly is not going to tolerate being played or entertain someone who she deems to be a playa.

Here we introduce the theory of the Five Star Restaurant……………..

Now when you think of a Five Star Restaurant, you expect to have an exquisite dining experience of no other. You expect that there will be a certain caliber of patrons who are accepted into these types of establishments. For the most part, accommodations are on a reservation only basis with walk-ins and undesirables usually not allowed. In addition to their commitment to providing an exemplary experience in a spectacular setting there is also a dedication to anticipate guest needs and surpass guests' expectations.

So it goes with the young lady who my friend is dealing with and with many other upright, respectable women in our society. The women that I am referring to are those that are shining examples of the quality and elegance that you would expect to see in those same Five Star restaurants. And just as Five Star restaurants seek to surpass the expectations of their guests, these types of women seek to go above and beyond normal expectations to meet the needs of the people in their lives. To that end and for this example we will refer to these women as just that…….Five Star restaurants.

With that being said, let me digress to the plight of the would-be patron of the Five Star restaurant.

In the course of exploring various establishments, a patron comes across many different types of restaurants. All of these places offer food to fulfill the hunger of the patron, but it is the type of food and the type of establishment that determines their choice.  For this example we will separate the types of establishments into two different categories: those that only accept patrons with dry shirts (i.e. Men that have their stuff together) and those that do not discriminate.

Let's discuss the latter first. One example of a restaurant that is indiscriminate towards would-be patrons is a fast food restaurant. In fact the fast food restaurant is on the total opposite extreme of the Five Star restaurant. If you really think about it, fast food joints do not care at all if you have a wet spot on your shirt. They are happy that you even have a shirt on period!  To that end, most of them even have drive-thru accommodations that can be used to get your food and go about your business. They do not even require you to sit down and stay for awhile! For those customers who do have wet spots on their shirts and are not seeking to change (clothes), this is the perfect set-up. Imagine if you are a “wet-shirter” and you can hang out all night doing whatever, and then go to your local Jack in the Box or Wendy's and “bust a grub” for the low-low and then bounce. Basically, you can “eat” there whenever you like with little to no expectations of proper dress or etiquette. In the real world of playas, these types of restaurants would be equivalent to the women in their lives who allow these brothers to come and go and do their “business” without even putting the slightest limitations on their behavior and activities. These women are in fact enabling these brothers to keep their shirt wet with no consequences.

Of course women are not totally at fault for brothers exhibiting these types of actions. It is ultimately the responsibility of the playas to begin to police their behaviors and begin to “turn from their wicked ways” but these obvious low self-esteem-having women are not bettering the cause either. I mean let's be honest………why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free!?!?!?

So let's go back and examine the type of establishments on the complete opposite end of the spectrum….the Five Stars. Obviously there are many different types of restaurants in between the two ends of the spectrum but for this discussion it is only relevant to describe the two polar ends. For our example we talked about someone who came across several types of establishments in the course of trying to fulfill their hunger. Now let's suggest that this particular person is of the wet shirt variety.  It would be safe to assume that the person in question has most likely eaten at various restaurants that are not as discriminate as the Five Stars and more specifically the previously mentioned fast food restaurants. These same restaurants may be the very reason why the person's shirt is still wet as they do not discourage the undesirable behaviors and often work to reinforce them. With that being said, what happens when this person comes across the proverbial Five Star restaurant? There are a couple of things that could occur at this juncture: the person could choose to adhere to the Five Star dress code in order to be admitted or not eat there at all (Straighten up or Beat It!).

As I stated previously Five Stars are extremely selective (as they should be) and do not tolerate the undesirable behavior that is exhibited by “wet-shirters”. Thus when a Five Star is encountered, a decision must be made by the hungry patron. One of the most obvious outcomes is non-compliance. When a playa that is used to having his way with women and coming and going as he pleases comes across our Five Star women who refuse to put up with such foolishness, many times the playa will reject the conditions put forth and retreat to his comfort zone in the recesses of the women who will allow his foolishness. They are not willing to step up to the plate and accept the challenge that the Five Stars represent, possibly due to their own feelings of insecurity and inadequacy about being with a woman of that caliber. Consequently the playa is only hurting self by not seeking to elevate his status and mind state.

Another possible outcome is the cover-up scenario. Again when the “wet-shirter” encounters the Five Star restaurant and their stringent dress code, it is obvious that the would-be patron will not be allowed entrance as-is. In some instances, the person desires to gain admittance into the restaurant even though they know they are not prepared to meet all of the requirements for being there. In those cases, they will often try to mask their wet shirt by putting an additional shirt on top of the wet one. This technique is often initially successful because it deceives the Five Star into believing that the would-be patron possesses the characteristics necessary for admittance. Once admitted what typically happens is that the wet spot, if big or damp enough, will begin to show through the clean dry shirt that has been placed on top of it as a façade. Even if this doesn't occur, it is likely that the patron will begin to exhibit the undesirable behaviors that led to spilling water on their shirt in the first place. Both of these scenarios will usually lead to the immediate rejection of the patron.

To bring it back home, this means that even if the man in question fools our Five Star woman into believing that he has changed his ways and she allows him into her cipher, if he has not truly removed his playa mentality then inevitably she will see through the front that he has put up, no matter how good it may have been.

So at this point we can obviously determine that the only scenario that will actually allow our hungry patron to experience the fine dining experience that is offered by the Five Star restaurant is adherence to its acknowledged dress and behavioral codes. Since it can be assumed that we all would like to eat at this type of establishment at some point in our lives, it is only right that we accept the fact that we can only have the full experience if we are properly clothed (in our right mind).

This leads back to my initial theory about allowing the wet spots on our shirts to dry over time or with the help of natural sunlight, or possibly a combination of the two. It is only then, with a truly dry shirt, can one elevate to the status of a regularly welcomed patron of a Five Star restaurant. With that being said, it is up to you to decide what caliber of woman you choose to consort with. So just think about that as you reflect on what types of restaurants you frequent now and the services they provide. Exactly what type of establishment do you want your next meal to come from? An upscale steakhouse or a greasy burger joint? An elegant bistro or Biscuitville? The decision is on you, PLAYA!!!