Thank you To my village:  It’s Not Just Mine It’s Ours. By Nikki Austin

I am finishing undergrad everybody, and going on to law school in the fall.  So what’s the big deal?  Well, I could say that the big deal is accomplishing this at thirty-three ~ though my baby brother Abstrack would just tell me to round up and admit to forty.   Perhaps the accomplishment is that somewhere in the midst of working full time while rearing 3 beautiful daughters (ages 15, 11, and 8) as a single parent while going to school full-time I managed to get this done in four years.  But you know what, if you ask me that is not the big deal here either.  The big deal is that walking across that stage will not just be my shining moment in time.  The big deal is that this achievement belongs to my entire village. 

Allow me to explain what I mean when I say my “village”.  It is my super-structured support system that runs from New York to Atlanta, Georgia.  It is all of the people who signed on to take this journey with me.  I am talking about my mother and father who put in the long hours babysitting while I am in class or pulling all-nighters.  My daughters’ paternal aunts, who despite the no longer existing relationship between their brother and myself still treat me as a sister and help to take care of their nieces.  I’m talking about my little brother who lovingly calls to remind me to stay on my game because, “I ain’t getting’ no younger, and time is surely runnin’ out.”  When I feel like I am just too tired to climb any more mountains or jump any more hurdles, I’m talking about my Nana who calls to tell me that she loves me and is so proud of what I’ve accomplished.  Now if that doesn’t remind me that I have to get up and keep moving then what will?  I am talking about my Auntie who infuses her words of wisdom with the word of God.  I am talking about my “extra parent”, the one who has given more support than any person outside of my family ever has.  This list just keeps going.  There are so many people who have given so much of themselves ~ their time, attention, finances, etc. ~ all to see me succeed.

Understand that my reasons for returning to school were multiple.  At twenty-eight I found myself a divorced, mother of three.  I had a job.  The money was not great, but it paid the bills.  My daughters were being private school educated.  This too was made possible because my village once again “pitched in”.  We were doing okay.  It was actually a conversation with my then seven-year old daughter than put a new face on things.  I was explaining to her the importance of education and why she and her sisters had to continue to do well in school and go to college.  She responded with the innocence of a child, “Mommy you didn’t go to college and you are a wonderful mommy.”  Now of course my girls know just how to get to me, and telling me that I am a beautiful and/or wonderful mommy is one of those ways.  However, as I looked her, I realized then that my girls are learning by my example, and while I love being their mother so much, I want them to know that they can be so much more than me.  The possibilities for them are endless.  I also wanted them to see the true strength of their family ~ their village.  When their father walked away leaving us with nothing, it was unbelievable the way our family rallied to make sure that we were okay.  My girls were young then, and there were some things that we (the family) made sure they were sheltered from.  It was time for them to see the strength of mighty tree from which their seeds had come.

I remember as a child that if you acted up out in the street and a neighborhood mother saw you; it was that mother that got you and then took you home so that your Mama could get you.  The village raised their children then.  The children belonged to the village.  I am so blessed that God has placed in my life such a great array of people.  Some of them are linked to me biologically, others simply by the role that they themselves have chosen to take.  All of them are actively walking this walk with me.  My family is so amazing.  Whatever the relation, I have been poked, prodded, pushed, urged and uplifted by each and every one of the people in my village.  I know that it can be easy to get caught up in our own “stuff” and that the concerns of others may not necessarily be our concerns.  But I am proof of how amazing it can be to make someone else your concern.

I am about to begin the beginning of another leg of my journey.  As I look around me I see that to no surprise my village is ready to come along.  My aunt says that we should ALWAYS trust God to give us what we need.  So I say thank you Lord for giving me this fine group of people. 

And to my village I say, “Thank you for raising me.  Any bounty or benefit gained from this journey is not mine, it is ours.”