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| What's
Really Going On? by Tim Whatley 
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Elaine has been my friend for almost ten years. I met her through a friend of the family over Christmas break from college. As soon as I saw her, I knew I wanted to be more than her friend. After our initial introduction, we proceeded in getting to know each other over the course of my vacation. I
found out that she was fresh out of a long-term relationship
and had been through her share of drama during it. As we became
better acquainted, I realized that I wanted to show this beautiful
lady drama did not have to be a part of her life and relationships
with men. We spent many late nights on the phone and saw each
other as much as possible. As with most “new” situations,
it was bliss. We became very close within a short amount of
time. We were open off each other, which is an incredible dynamic
to be a part of.
The night before I was to head back to college for the spring semester, Elaine came to my house to spend my last evening at home with me. We talked, watched television, looked at some of my childhood pictures and reveled in each other’s presence. As the night progressed and we became more comfortable around each other, our displays of affection became more pronounced. Touching, holding hands, shoulder massages…before I realized, she was sitting on my lap as we watched TV in an easy chair. The phone rang, and on the other end were our best friends who were thrown together because of the circumstance which she and I put them in. As I talked to my boy on the phone, a moment occurred where our eyes met, we knew exactly what the other was thinking. We began to kiss, and continued to do so for the remainder of the phone call; even taking time to pass the phone to allow her best friend to think she was actually paying attention to their one-sided conversation. “The Kiss” – have you ever seen one of those cutaways on a television program or in a movie where the people kiss, and they show fireworks going off? That was it. When our friends realized that we were not being very good conversationalists, the phone call ended and Elaine and I continued. We came very close to making love that night, but it was not meant to be. I went back to school floating on air. We kept in contact with phone calls and letters, and had made plans for her to come visit me at school in the coming months. As the semester got into full swing, I was too busy to notice the decline in contact. One day I got a phone call early in the evening and Elaine was on the other end. She told me that she and her ex had been seeing each other again and they were going to try and work things out. That was the end of our contact for a couple of years. I always asked about her through our mutual friend and was able keep tabs on her. A few years later, over another Christmas break, I got in contact with her and went to visit. Even then, I could still feel the dynamic between us, but we had both decided that the chance of us being had passed us by. From then on, she and I have remained a part of each other’s lives, and been very close confidants. The “what ifs” still pop up conversation. |
